How to Celebrate Christmas

If you don’t have an advent calendar – you know, one of those ones with chocolate hiding behind cardboard flaps that you can get at the dollar store – you’re doing it wrong.


My sister is doing it wrong.


Me: Want a chocolate?  I’m like two weeks behind.

Megan: No, I don’t like those.

Me: Here, you can have the 8th.

Megan: They taste like wax.

Me: They taste like your childhood!

Megan: I don’t remember my childhood tasting like ass.

Me: Mmmm a drum…




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