One day, you’re the best thing since sliced bread. The next day, you’re toast.
I recently quit my job. 13 days ago, in fact. Tomorrow is my last day. To commemorate that, here is a gem of a post-4 pm IM conversation.
Me: <quote about SharePoint 2013 finally letting you copy/paste into rich text editors>
Me: HOORAY FOR SHAREPOINT 2013
Friend: but. no design tab on SPD.
Me: but copy paste
Me: it’s like they’ve embraced 10 years ago
Friend: look at these NEW FEATURES
Friend: oh and we heard that ‘apps’ was a cool word, so we started calling everything an ‘app’
Me: it already was apps
Me; except we said applications
Me: which is way more intimidating
Friend: yeah, that’s too technical for a business user
Friend: they can’t think of how an application could work. but an app… they’ve got ideas there
Friend: do you happen to have that friend
Friend: who always has a cool mobile app idea
Firend: and wants you to help them
Me: I am that friend
Friend: I feel like you’re not exactly that friend… you might actually have a legitimate idea
Me: yeah but i don’t want to do it myself
Friend: my friends are like ‘we should make an app for text books for students’
Me; your friends sound boring
Friend: And I’m like… you mean.. like the thing that’s already been done. by a team of people. who are way better at what they do than me?
Me: yeah i totally have an e text book and it’s great
Me; The arrow keys don’t work
Me: so you should make an app
Friend: seriusly though, people constantly talk to me about crap like that… drives me insane
Me: seriuosly though, if you only do work at work, they give up
Me: you have to stop like building robots in your free time
Friend: I actaully haven’t written any code outside of work since I started here
Me: because work sucks all the fun out of it
Friend: I get like… oooh I have this cool idea of a thing to ma… oh my god I’m doing work for fun NOOOOOOOOOOO
Me: you should start a blog
Friend: and then I sit on the couch and binge netflix until I pass out
Me: then you could become internet famous
Me; your blog could just be like stuff you would do if work didn’t suck all the life out of you
Me: also, it could involve gifs
Friend: but could it involve jif-gifs?
Me: yeah i don’t get it
Friend: never mind then… pronounciation + peanutbutter joke
Me: peanut butter is delicious
What candy do you eat on the playground?
What’s orange and sounds like a parrot?
What is black, white, green, and bumpy?
A pickle wearing a tuxedo!
Why did Eve bite the forbidden apple?
Because it tasted better than Adam’s banana.